Penname: ladylarna [Contact]
Real name: Larna
Member Since: 12/06/2005
Membership status: Member

Thanks for checking out my stuff, and I do hope you enjoy it. I'm currently inactive in the world of fanfic, but please check out my wizard rock project, Snidget, at myspace.com/goldensnidget.



Beta-reader: No
Gender: female


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Reviews by ladylarna

There is a strange, emerald-eyed man who lives on the corner of Adian Avenue, forever alone and anonymous. That is, however, until a young boy on the cusp of entering the magical world visits him and reveals, for a time, the true secret of the hermit of Adian Avenue. [one-shot]



Categories: Harry Potter; Characters: None; Archive Challenge: None
Classification: General Fan Fiction
Crossover Classes: None
Genres: General
Warnings: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents Series: None
Word count: 1862; Read Count: 582; Completed: Yes

Updated: 08/23/2006; Published: 08/23/2006
Reviewer: ladylarna (Signed)
10/01/2006
A fun little story with that dark edge. I really liked it... I can just imagine the reactions when he figured out it was Harry Potter he had spoken with. Perfectly set up, well done.


Chapter 1: The Man from Adian Avenue
The Perfect Rain by MayItBe [Mid Teens]
[Reviews - 5]

We all know what happens to James and Lily in the end, but what about the beginning? Starting in the end of their seventh year, up until that fateful Halloween night. Follow James and Lily, along with the rest of the marauder’s battling N.E.W.T.’s, jobs, tests, and He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. Some mild swearing, and there will be a very mild scene of a sexual nature later on.



Categories: Harry Potter; Characters: None; Archive Challenge: None
Classification: Romance
Crossover Classes: None
Genres: Action/Adventure, Drama, Fluff, General
Warnings: Mild Language
Chapters: 4 Table of Contents Series: None
Word count: 7193; Read Count: 3074; Completed: No

Updated: 04/18/2008; Published: 09/01/2006
Reviewer: ladylarna (Signed)
10/28/2006

An intersting chapter, good until the end (in my opinion).

Be careful not to fall into writing the same book JKR already has (your commentator, for example, could be original but instead you just copied Lee). Your writing is good - could use some grammatical polish, but it's good - so just have faith in your writing ability and expand a little to make these characters memorable.




Chapter 1: Magic
Reviewer: ladylarna (Signed)
10/28/2006

This chapter wasn't as strong. Still, I can tell by your writing that you have potential, so I'll keep my eye out for updates.

Keep writing!




Chapter 2: Story Of A Girl
by []
[Reviews - ]


Categories: Orphan; Characters: None; Archive Challenge: None
Classification: None
Crossover Classes: None
Genres: None
Warnings: None
Chapters: 0 Table of Contents Series: None
Word count: 0; Read Count: 0; Completed: No

Updated: 12/31/1969; Published: 12/31/1969
Reviewer: ladylarna (Signed)
09/29/2006
Ha, amusing. Yay vanishing cabinets! :) And I'm really amused that you got Vanish stuck in your head... bwahaha.

Author's Response: *laughs* Thanks for the review! And yeah, I was like... gaaaah, I need to get this out of my head! I do like that song, though. :D



Chapter 1: Vanishing Cabinet

When Harry could never understand the power the dark lord didn't know of, he found the most unusual teacher. A very unique one-shot, which I hope you enjoy reading!



Categories: Harry Potter; Characters: None; Archive Challenge: None
Classification: Dark Fiction
Crossover Classes: None
Genres: Angst, General
Warnings: Character Death, Dark Fiction, Mild Language, Mild Violence
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents Series: None
Word count: 6471; Read Count: 638; Completed: Yes

Updated: 09/03/2006; Published: 09/03/2006
Reviewer: ladylarna (Signed)
09/04/2006

I'll try not to stray too heavily into beta-mode while writing this review, but let me first say that you had some extreme exclamation point abuse in the first half of this story... they should be used sparingly. ;)

That said, this was really interesting and very well developed. There were times this could have used a few more lines here and there for flow and setting changes, but all in all you told your story very well. I'm glad you chose to do this as a oneshot and not a chaptered affair... it felt very natural like this, with the exception of the very beginning which felt apart from the rest of the story.

You did a fantastic job of conveying the emotions throughout the story, especially in the second half. Good writing, just needed some polish.

You really are getting so much better! You were right, this is one of the best things you've written.




Chapter 1: Chapter 1

In 1991, Quirrell is ordered to attack Harry directly. As a result, the Boy-Who-Lived will never be alone in the fight again.



Categories: Harry Potter; Characters: None; Archive Challenge: None
Classification: General Fan Fiction
Crossover Classes: None
Genres: Action/Adventure, General, Mystery
Warnings: Mild Language, Mild Violence
Chapters: 4 Table of Contents Series: None
Word count: 5632; Read Count: 2327; Completed: No

Updated: 10/30/2006; Published: 09/05/2006
Reviewer: ladylarna (Signed)
09/10/2006
Interesting premise, and good first chapter. Nice writing.


Chapter 1: Prologue: Set Your Spirit Free
Reviewer: ladylarna (Signed)
09/10/2006

Even if she had known what cardio-pulmonary resuscitation was, Minerva couldn't have answered. For only now had the meaning, and the connotations, of the name Harry sunk into her brain.

^^Those two sentences are art. Love it. Your characterization of Hagrid seems a bit off, and your development is occasionally awkward, but this is an interesting story so far and I can't wait to see where you end up taking it.




Chapter 2: Waiting for a Touch
Reviewer: ladylarna (Signed)
09/12/2006
Good chapter, your Harry is interesting.


Chapter 3: They Live Inside Your Heart
starstarstarhalf-star [Reviews - 2]

Now that Voldemort has been defeated, Harry settles down to play international Quidditch. But just as he gets on the team, an urgent letter arrives from an illegal Aruor association to help deal with a growing gang of Death Eaters the Ministry—which is "pulling a Fudge"—refuses to believe exists. But Harry has to keep his new life a secret from everyone who's close to him, including a secret he's had for years now, a secret which is more responsibility than he's ever known before.



Categories: Harry Potter; Characters: None; Archive Challenge: None
Classification: Dark Fiction
Crossover Classes: None
Genres: Action/Adventure, General
Warnings: Character Death, Mild Language, Mild Violence, Sexual Situations
Chapters: 2 Table of Contents Series: None
Word count: 4680; Read Count: 1215; Completed: No

Updated: 09/19/2006; Published: 09/07/2006
Reviewer: ladylarna (Signed)
09/10/2006
Good characterizations and establishment of setting; this worked well as a beginning of a story. Just be sure to keep it interesting as it goes on! :)


Chapter 1: Chapter 1: Quidditch, Orphans, and Harrys
No Longer by GryffinGal [All Ages]
starstarstarstarstar [Reviews - 3]

She's trapped within herself...



Categories: Harry Potter; Characters: None; Archive Challenge: None
Classification: Drabble
Crossover Classes: None
Genres: None
Warnings: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents Series: None
Word count: 266; Read Count: 445; Completed: Yes

Updated: 09/10/2006; Published: 09/10/2006
Reviewer: ladylarna (Signed)
09/10/2006

Some punctuation and small errors (" pain... Somehow" shouldn't be capitalized, should it?), but the emotion in the piece almost completely overrode it.

Just be careful, because you can't get away with as much in a drabble. :) Good writing, though, and the last line brought it all together very cleanly.




Chapter 1: No Longer