Penname: sophianwin [Contact]
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Member Since: 05/11/2006
Membership status: Member



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Reviews by sophianwin
It All Went Right... by Lesa [Mid Teens]
starstarstarstarstar [Reviews - 6]
From their first school year to death, this group of friends have been 'til death do us part'. I am here to tell you their story. MWPP; RL/OC, SB/OC, PP/OC, SS/OC, J/L

Categories: Harry Potter; Characters: None; Archive Challenge: None
Classification: Pre-Canon, Romance
Crossover Classes: None
Genres: Action/Adventure, Drama, Fluff
Warnings: Alcohol and/or Drug Abuse, Mild Language, Mild Violence, Sexual Situations, Strong Language, Strong Violence
Chapters: 2 Table of Contents Series: None
Word count: 3707; Read Count: 1077; Completed: No

Updated: 03/26/2006; Published: 10/10/2005
Reviewer: sophianwin (Signed)
05/15/2006
I did love the minister, but I have to say that Jo never did mention that they were married...then again, she never said that they weren't married. This seems promising, as long as your characters (especially the female ones) are not too perfect (as this tends to happen with Marauders story). I trust you though, because you have talent!



Chapter 1: Prologue: Wedding Bells
Reviewer: sophianwin (Signed)
05/15/2006

I'm a little confused at this point, especially since you brought in all of the characters so quickly. I'll read it more carefully later, your characters do seem interesting, and your writing is great! I loved how you characterized Peter as someone who wasn't as stupid as a lot of the other fanfiction writers portray him as.

As you can see, I'm a huge stickler for creativity...and a huge hypocrite. Hopefully, you won't think me so. My own story is just beginning, so...right. No more blatant self-advertising.

Do forgive me, and keep up the great work,

sophianwin 




Chapter 2: Year One: Beginnings
What would happen if Professor McGonagall had two beautiful nieces that went to school with the Marauders, and one of them had a pet tiger and the other had a psychic cat?

Categories: Harry Potter; Characters: None; Archive Challenge: None
Classification: Romance
Crossover Classes: None
Genres: Drama, Fluff, General
Warnings: Alcohol and/or Drug Abuse, Alternate Universe, Character Death, Mild Language, Mild Violence, Sexual Situations
Chapters: 21 Table of Contents Series: None
Word count: 39877; Read Count: 16152; Completed: No

Updated: 07/30/2006; Published: 05/08/2006
Reviewer: sophianwin (Signed)
05/25/2006

Hm...your writing is good, but you may have gotten this warning before; take care not to make your character, particularly Sapphire, a Mary-Sue. She is already beautiful, innocent (this could be read as "pure") powerful (an Unregistered Animagus), and caring. She also has a lot of boys after her, and is popular. Be sure to give her flaws. The only one that you have listed so far is her naivete, which is a bit of a virtue as well.

I thought that you could've showed more emotion on Sapphire's part when she found out the news about her mother, and when she found out about Remus. While James, Sirius, Peter, and others were quite accepting of Lupin's...furry little problem...remember that a large part of the wizarding world distrusts werewolves. I'd like to see more shock on Sapphire's part.



Author's Response: thanx 4 ur comments



Chapter 1: A Lost Jewel