Real name: Hadeer
Member Since: 05/08/07
Membership status: Member
Hello - BloodRayne from MNFF here, hoping to produce something substantially good enough to be viewed by a stranger's eyes.
Dad left Mom. Mom was fine. Mom met Paul. Mom married Paul. I was fine. I met Kimberley.
...Stepsisters aren't all that bad, you know.
Wow, Mariah, I so loved that! It was really funny - I guess some people aren't shy at all huh? That Kimberly really got on my nerves. Poor Heather. But you could really go on with this - it'd be cool to see other ways Kim annoys Heather. It's a really great story! And it's also inspired me to write a stepsister themed story - although with a completely different plot.
I don't understand. Is he going to rape her or is he keeping her here so they can capture her mother? Or are they going to capture Gabriella as well? Had Colin been a traitor all along?
Oh dear God.
That was absoultely stunning. I stand before you, utterly speechless. I have got tears in my eyes - this is...just so beautiful. The use of second person worked wonders here, and I absolutely loved the bits in parenthesis you used, they were really a highlight of the story. But wow - this story is just too good for words - nothing can describe how amazing it is. You, my dear, are an extrodinary writer. This story...wow. Don't ever stop writing. This was enchanting, phenomenal, haunting...simply beautiful!
It's Valentine's Day. How can Caleb Malone, a creature believed to exist only in myths and legends, convince his human friend of his true existence?
A teenage girl wonders about the aspects of love and asks you, the reader, to help her figure out whether she is in love or not with a man she met through her ex.
I like the way Nicole speaks. The first paragraph really got me hooked - it's written beautifully. But I didn't understand - what happened to Jason? I understand the man she went out with was six years her senior - but that couldn't be Jason - could it?
When teenager Cassie Sherman gives up her infant daughter, she never dreams that they will one day meet again. Circumstances and perhaps a touch of a higher power, however, dictate differently...but can she find her daughter in time to save her life?
A pregnant woman, tainted before her own birth, finds that her baby will become the Devil's child and result in the end of days. Now she must deal with the discovery and figure out if she should kill her baby or let him live and bring about the end of the world.
That was...a bit disturbing, frankly. Not to say I didn't like it - so please don't take offense! It's actually quite an interesting story, really. It had me hooked from the first chapter. In the second chapter, you mentioned you being uncomfortable with the use of the c-word, but I think sometimes it is necessary to use certain words and descriptions. I know when I pictured that old woman cursing like that it increased my terror of her. You had that scene written well.
Father Michael...let me just say I immedietely thought of Silas from The Da Vinci Code. Anyway, he seemed a bit odd to me from the start, but attempting to murder Raven's child...and having sex with Christina. I don't know how that man got to be a priest.
This last chapter...Raven has gone mad, hasn't she? The necrophilia just didn't seem to suit her personality unless she had gotten extremely sick in the head. And then murdering her father for her baby...wow, I would like an epilouge though. I feel like I need more closure, although it is fine the way it is, I just always like to see how things end, ya know. Great story, although it certainly scared me a bit.
Thank you very much for the review. Silas was a bit of an inspiration for that character on top of an albino friend of mine.
He is very twisted but believed he was doing everything in the name of God. I was hoping to write another story for Christina.
And last but not least, yes, Raven had become very sick. Thanks again for reading
She's gonna marry his...dad? Wow...tough...although the way you've written it seems like she is going to start some kind of affair with her husband's son...that would be an interesting dilemma to read about. I liked your story, though.
Her smile was unchanging, but her eyes became oddly unfocused.
Sunshine, smiles, and poolside laughter can be unsettlingly deceiving.
In a world where darkness rules, and Humans, Pixies, Centaurs and Forest Maidens are forced into slavery, there seems to be no hope for those who are deemed weak, and lead a life of suffering.
One girl wants to change all that, and hopes to lead a revolution against The Leader, and all his beliefs. But she cannot do it if she doesn't understand her own kind, and what she, and everyone else, wants.
Will she create a better, fairer life for everyone? Or will she just make things worse? After all, all she has to go on are the words of stories, which no one knows are true...
This plot has really gotten my attention, Evie! I like how you went right through and introduced the main character (Grace, right?) without wasting time, even if it is a very short, and not very informative intro. This makes me hungry for more. I want to get to know Grace. The idea of water or fire, poverty or wealth, is an interesting one. Can't wait for the next chapter!
Thank you! Yes, the main character is Grace. :)
I've seen this riddle before in Yu-Gi-Oh! If only I could remember it...but are you supposed to know who is the liar and who is the truth-teller? Because if you do, wouldn't you just ask which road was the road to happiness? Or am I missing something incredibly huge here? Sorry, I was never good with riddles! But I'd love to know the answer.
Anyay, water=poverty, if I recall correctly. This is great...I can't wait for the rebellion. I like how you're taking things slow. I don't like rushed stories, and you're doing the exact opposite, and yet not too slow. So good for you! Keep going!
No, you do not know which man is which. :) I'll tell you the answer at the begining of the next chapter.
Thanks for reviewing!
This is wonderful! I'm a fan of gore, so the image that was conveyed when Mila was ripping her own skin...the simple act, that she was hurting herself...it just made it all the more horrible!
Is there a continuation to this? Are we going to know more about Nodnol and the woman who killed Mila? Because I'd love for that to happen.
Thank you! I'm hoping to do a few more drabbles, and I'm really hoping to do a full length story about this world. Time will tell...
That song calls me. Am I human? Maybe. No one knows. No one knows that it's me - me that takes the children. No one knows where they go.
They just vanish.
I only came a short while ago. But it's been enough time.
Why do you fear me so? The same reason you fear the dark. The same reason you fear that strange noise outside your window.
Because you can't see me. You can't stop me.
So here is the story of a few of my memorable victims. Read it, if you must, and make up your own mind on what I am, and where they go...
I loved that! It felt creepy, like the feeling you get when you see Armageddon or something...I wonder just what our little snatcher is, though...
One thing confused me. Ashley and Ethan. Is Ashley a boy's name? And the part with the teddy bear, you said he grabbed his sister's teddy bear. What was that about.
Yes, Ashley is very much a boys name in England. It can be a girls name, but more often than not it's a boys name, contrary to America. ;) Maybe I should of used a different name, sorry!
I said sisters teddy bear because they have a sister, though she doesn't appear in the story I just thought it'd be weird for two teenage boys to have a teddy-bear. :p
I'm glad you like the story!
Magdalena, 16-years-old, lives in Livorno (Tuscany), Italy. Ryan, 17-years-old, lives in Albany, Western Australia. How do the lives of these two teens interwine? Well, by being pen pals! They are assigned as each other's pen pals in a website and start corresponding easily, for they have common interests.
So how is this interesting? Well, Magdalena's father is offered a job...in a company in Albany! And who has to move along with him? Right -- the rest of the family. Who lives in Albany too again?
Numerous sub-plots and secondary characters (and BE AWARE of the band geekiness =P)
WELL, the only reason Magdalena and her dad talked through e-mail was because she needed an assignment she'd forgotten to print; and Ryan only talked to his dad through e-mail because his dad wasn't going to be there until the next day and he wanted to clear things up.
Also, I wanted to introduce their e-mails, since they'll be used in the (near) future.
And no, for some odd reason, I don't find it very difficult. I mean, I'm going to start using ANOTHER way for making things a bit easier, but it'll still have the e-mails, of course. I mean, I really like this format and I'm not about to give it up.
Well, thanks for reviewing! =D It's really appreciated!