You have a very compelling way of writing . . . I like it! As an avid fantasy lover, stories like these tickle my fancy, and finding a good one is always great. This one was uber with the goodness. *nods*
Okay, I will tell you that I thoroughly enjoyed it despite the girl's demise and I wish it had been drawn out a little more but your style was effective and you got your point across... Good Job....
P.S. Do we get to learn more about Ezlener??
Thank you! This was meant as a drabble, so I didn't want it to be very long. I'm hoping to do a full length something with Ezlener though.
To start, I want to say that this fic was terrific. It gives me a sort of chill thinking about the "underdwellers". I really loved it and I actually kind of wish I was an -forgive me- underdweller. It's a little morbid but I think I could handle the life style. Haha.
Anyway, my point being, I thought that it was very well written and it kept me interested from start to finish!
Thank you, I'm glad you liked it.
You know what's most creepy about this for me? I went to London recently with my mates and we went in one of the underground foot tunnels.
Anyways, I love this fic - it's definately creepy and would make an awesome movie. I love your description - especially the market. I'd love to see a spin off with Ezlener - he sounds so cool! :)
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm really glad you liked it.
I had to skip one of the last sentences because blood makes me queasy. : P At any rate, I loved this! Very, very creepy, but really meaningful, too.
I really liked the first section (the four beginning paragraphs before the little squiggly lines?), which is why I was drawn in. You went right into explaining about Jaely and her life and mannerisms, but not in a way that made the introduction seem too mundane or informative. I loved the way you characterized Jaely in that section, and the way you set the reader up for what's coming. Immediately we know that something terrible will happen to her because of her own personality, but we are left to wonder (and read about) what exactly that is...great job on that! It almost reminded me, in a weird way, of the prologue to Romeo and Juliet. Sort of.
Anyway, I really like the idea you conveyed here, that living in "ignorance" is not always the best route to travel.
The descriptions of the Underplace were really good as well, I thought. You made it seem very real... the looks of the people and the market, and even the little glimpses of the "neighborhoods" outside. I especially loved that you showed a certain social status bar; the reader knows that there are poor, lowly people AND higher-class people in this other world as well as ours, which was illustrated both in the clothing worn and the two contrasting glimpses of villages outside. I loved that!
Again, great job, and good luck in the challenge!
Thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it, I was worried it would be complete garbage. Thank you for my first ever review!