Author's Response: I hope you have enjoyed the rest of the story. Thank you for taking the time to review.
Scary. The story is compelling and your details about vampirism keep me interested. I especially liked how you described sunlight as a sweeping inferno.
A few lines of dialogue from the please-men seemed a bit forced, but other than that I really enjoyed it!
Keep it up and happy fourth.
An interesting start... I liked it. I have never seen a "nice" vampire in a HP fiction such as the old man seems to be, and it gives a fresh angle to your story.
One thing I noticed was near the very end, when you switched the point of view to his Aunt Petunia for only a few lines and then switched back. It was sort of awkward and I had to think about it for a minute before I realized what you were doing. Read the story over (and better yet, have someone else read it too) and look for any parts that may have been skimmed by too fast or dont have enough detail in them, such as Aunt Petunia's POV.
Great start, keep it up!
You've got me intrigued...can't wait to see what comes next.
Keep writing! :)