Again, a wonderful story! Hopefully you will consider writing more. I know I am not a big review person, but do not doubt that I loved this story and the one before it. They kept my attention off of the hardships currently in my life. Excellent work!
I read both stories. What an interesting take on the retelling of JK's stories! The plot moves well. The characters were well-drawn although obviously not canon. Harry rings a little "untrue" in that someone with the kind of psychological damage he experienced is not likely to perform as strongly as Harry does in these stories.
I would also have liked to see more interaction with Draco Malfoy. Harry's experience with Ginny could have yielded a significant enrichment of the plot if you had showed more development of their relationship.
There are some technical errors in your writing that you should work on. Learn the difference between "site" and "sight", "bare" and "bear", "affect" and "effect" for example. You also make the common mistake of using incorrect grammer in an effort to write a gender-nuetral piece.
Using "their" when the correct form is "his" or "her" is always wrong and interfers with the story flow. For example, you wrote "... Harry’s wand (very carefully since no one could actually touch it without burning their own hands ..." is never correct. If you know the gender, you should use the grammatically correct pronoun "his" or "her". If you insist on gender-neutrality, then rewrite the sentence. For example, "... Harry’s wand (very carefully since people could not actually touch it without burning their own hands."
There were a few mispelled words, not too many. You should also try for economy of expression. For example, you frequently use "off of" when "off" works better for the story flow. Example, "... Harry’s glasses off of the bedside table ..." should be, "... Harry’s glasses off the bedside table ..." Another example, "...eyes off of Harry ..." should be "... eyes off Harry ..."
You frequently use too many compund sentences. Shorter sentences often help the story flow better, especially in an action story such as this one. You wrote, "Somehow someone had taken a picture of Sirius holding Harry on the Quidditch pitch and with Rita Skeeter announcing Cedric’s death and Harry Potter’s struggle to stay alive, the wizarding world wanted answers, answers that only Harry Potter had." This would flow better if you wrote, "Somehow, someone had taken a picture of Sirius holding Harry on the Quidditch pitch. With Rita Skeeter announcing Cedric’s death and Harry Potter’s struggle to stay alive, the wizarding world wanted answers. Answers that only Harry Potter could provide."
All-in-all, this was an interesting read. Thanks.
I REALLY LIKED IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please make a sequel! Please! I am on my knees begging you! Please make a sequel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!