Lightning Over Hogwarts
Reviews For Court Ordered Diet
Reviewer: hpgwfan (Signed)
08/14/2008 04:22 pm
Reviewer: hpgwfan (Signed)
08/14/2008 03:44 pm
OMG
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Stink Sap and a Permanent Sticking Charm
Reviewer: hpgwfan (Signed)
08/14/2008 03:09 pm
Reviewer: apollo13 (Signed)
12/24/2007 10:57 am
Lol, I can assure you, the RSPCA (The main Animal charity in England) would not gas a kitten!! Also, pants mean underwear in England, it should be trousers or jeans. ;) Apart from those two nit-picks, I really liked it, it's shaping up well. :)
~Evie
Diet Honeymoon
Reviewer: apollo13 (Signed)
12/24/2007 10:48 am
This is an interesting, humourus start to what looks like a promisingly original fic. The only crit I can come up with is that there are a lot or Americanisms in here - yard should be garden, a police car is actually white and blue. ectr.
Apart from that, it's brilliant! :D
~Evie
Dudley Gets Caught
Reviewer: bookish327 (Signed)
09/22/2007 07:06 pm
So, why didn't Ginny make an appearance there with the other three in Chapter 11? Does it come back to you wanting to tie it in with what's going on at the beginning of HBP? It appears that she must be awake, since her bedroom door seems to open and close while the trio are having their discussion.
I really liked COURT ORDERED DIET. I also liked how you weaved it in to JK's writing so that it fit right in there seamlessly. Please write more stories (in addition to the epilogue you mentioned). Thanks! : )
It's All True, Every Word!
Reviewer: bookish327 (Signed)
09/22/2007 06:45 pm
More interesting developments. Does Snape just really like the kneazle, or is there some larger gain in owning the cat-like creature? (Like, could it be valuable, in a way similar to how a niffler is valuable to someone wanting to obtain shiny, valuable objects?)
Anyway, I'm still really enjoying this story. I would love to read an epilogue of letters from Dudley through the rest of the summer. If you write them, I'll definitely read them. Thanks for Chapters 1-10. On to Chapter 11. : )
Let's Make a Deal
Reviewer: bookish327 (Signed)
09/22/2007 06:20 pm
I really like how much Dudley has evolved. He's by no means a great person now, but he's no longer bullying Harry tirelessly. I've enjoyed how you had Harry trying to teach Dudley right from wrong and responsibility for his own actions over the course of this story, as best as he could. I also really like that you've added more depth to Snape. Despite his having wanted to loathe Harry in every single way over the years, in this story, Snape's finally forced to get some perspective (e.g., Harry's neglect, malnourishment, acceptance of his family's abuse of him, etc.). I also
like how he's going to bring it all to Dumbledore's attention, too, even though he doesn't want to care at all for Potter personally. It's good to see the positive side of him, since it creates a more well-rounded character. So, I think you've done an excellent job of expanding both Dudley and Snape as characters.
like how he's going to bring it all to Dumbledore's attention, too, even though he doesn't want to care at all for Potter personally. It's good to see the positive side of him, since it creates a more well-rounded character. So, I think you've done an excellent job of expanding both Dudley and Snape as characters.
It's Harry's Fault!
Reviewer: bookish327 (Signed)
09/22/2007 01:35 am
Another great chapter. : ) I loved all of Harry's improvised puppy and kitten gifts. It's funny yet appropriate how his puppy gift to Ginny would catch him completely unawares in its appearance to her. Even here in your story, Harry unconsciously thinks of her differently than his other friends. After all, he didn't send Ron the puppy, and he's his best mate! Nor Hermione (although the puppy would have been an inappropriate travel companion in Australia, no doubt : ) ). So, good job in implying where Harry's thoughts about Ginny are leading him without his knowledge. Even in Alternate Universe, they're still meant to be. : ) (I'm an incurable shipper, can you tell?) On to the next chapter . . . .
The Potion
Reviewer: bookish327 (Signed)
09/22/2007 01:00 am
Like I said in my review of Chapter 1, I love how you weave humor into your writing. Harry's ongoing back-burner gardening thoughts are great. ("It was important to maintain clean flowerbeds!" This Harry Potter is a bit obsessive-compulsive in his landscaping pursuits. : ) ) Imagine THE Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived, delighting in the idea of installing a pond in order to attract fairies. It's so cutely odd that I can't help cracking up each time I think of it. : ) Also, his new roles as warden, fitness instructor, tutor, short-order cook, etc. add clever send-ups to the normal dreadful monotony of his time at Privet Drive. I have a mental picture of him racing back and forth from his many tasks in order to get everything done for which he's responsible while still noting to himself that he's got to get those violets planted and take a shower before preparing the next snack or meal. He's like a harried housewife; he's Harry, the Domestic God. :D (A take-off on Domestic Goddess for those not following my pun.)
Anyway, great job with another fun chapter. : )
Diet Honeymoon